Music Production and Promotion Tips

How to Leave a Band

Posted on | December 27, 2012 | No Comments

Being in a band can be a difficult bond to break, you spend a lot of time together, work hard together collectively and may even make some money together. Leaving a band can be a difficult thing to do both for yourself and for the other members. Whatever your reasons for leaving a band, whether you’re moving away or you’d just like to move on to something else, there are certain ways that you should go about it, and believe it or not a certain etiquette is involved when it comes to working out how to leave a band.

Tip # 1 – Don’t Make Any Rash Decisions
You don’t want to be going back to your band a week later with your tail between your legs asking them to let you back in. Quitting on a whim or when you don’t mean it is just a hassle for everyone,  make sure that you really want to part before going to the stress of actually taking the plunge and leaving your band. Sleep on it, take a few days, weeks or even months to make a thorough and well thought out decision.

Tip # 2 – Resolve Issues If You Can
Tying in nicely with my first tip, you might not even have to leave the band if your issues aren’t too serious or can be resolved. Lost your love of the style of music you’re playing? Confront the rest of your band members and see if you can do something different to keep it interesting. Involved in a dispute? Be honest and see if it can be sorted out before just leaving. Make sure you have made efforts to stay in the band if you really want to deep down.

Tip # 3 – Be Honest and Do It In Person
I know it sounds a lot like tips for breaking up from a relationship, but in a lot of ways that is the closest experience you might get to leaving a band, and some of the same rules apply. Don’t make up crappy excuses or sugar coat the truth, be honest and up front and make sure the rest of the people you have shared the experience of starting a band with know what is going on in your head, they will have a lot more respect for you. Hopefully the people you will be discussing this with are friends who already respect you, and though a conversation in person can be quite a frightening or daunting prospect, it is definitely the right way to go about it. There is no reason for arguments and the handover to new band member can be quite amicable.

Tip # 4 – Don’t See Yourself as The Bad Guy
A lot of people struggle to leave bands as they see themselves as breaking up something good, and if you follow the steps outlined above you will have made every effort not to do so. If you simply have to leave then it is fair enough, you are not obligated to do otherwise and sad as it may be, you shouldn’t feel bad.


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